


in dreams

by boneslen



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Dreams, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:42:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23830255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boneslen/pseuds/boneslen
Summary: In dreams, they can still be together.
Relationships: John Marston & Arthur Morgan, John Marston/Arthur Morgan
Comments: 5
Kudos: 39





	in dreams

"When I go–"

"Oh please," John interrupted, rolling his eyes at the audacity of Arthur's words. "You're not going anywhere."

Arthur trotted his horse closer to John's, and gently placed his hand on John's shoulder. "Listen."

John gave Arthur a withering stare. 

"When I go, take care of Abigail and Jack. Don't look back...and try to make a good life for all of you." Arthur's eyes were intensely fixed on John's. "And don't forget that in the end, everything I did, I did for you."

"Arthur, what are you even talking about?" John tried to shrug Arthur's hand off, but the other man wasn't having it. "You're not going anywhere. You're fine...you're _healthy_."

The look on Arthur's face told a completely different story. 

"John, I want you to have a better life than I did. You're a better man–"

"No, _you're_ the best man I know," John insisted, cutting Arthur off once again. Their horses had stopped moving now, and they were now just standing in the middle of the road. "You might not think it, but it's true."

"Listen–"

"No." John stared back at Arthur, defiant. "Stop talking as if you're going to die. You're not. And I'm not leaving you."

Arthur's eyes became soft, and there was a sad sort of warmth in them. With a wrench to his gut, John realized something was wrong. With desperation, John reached out and grasped Arthur's shirt. He twisted the fabric in his grip and pleadingly searched Arthur's eyes. 

"Arthur..."

"I'm already dead, John."

John didn't want to believe it. With every ounce of willpower that he had, he squeezed Arthur's shirt tighter in his hand. The fabric felt real...but there was no pain. There should be pain, John thought. He was squeezing the fabric so tightly that his skin should be ripping, or his nails should be cutting into his palm. But there was no pain.

With ferocity, John glanced up at Arthur. Those kind blue eyes were watching John's every move. The sun's golden glow was shining on Arthur's face, and John realized with an ache that it was only on Arthur.

"Goodbye, John."

"No wait, I–"

John jerked awake. He wildly surveyed the dark wooden house, his eyes desperate for the sight of Arthur Morgan. Yet the only thing he saw were the sleeping forms of Abigail and Jack. With realization that it had all been a dream, John rose to his feet. He exited the house as quick as he could, pushing open the door to the dark outdoors. The sun was just beginning to rise, casting a soft pinkish glow into the depth of the night. 

But as John looked wildly around the fields, he realized there was nowhere to even go. This was his life now. This was the life Arthur had died fighting for. John collapsed to the ground, feeling the dirt and grass underneath him. 

He missed Arthur more than he could even bear. 

"Come back," John said aloud, his voice grated and raspy. The words were gentle and pleading, disrupting the silence of the night. "Arthur..."

There were so many things John wanted to say to him. He knew something was wrong with Arthur near the end, but the fretting anxiety seemed to overwhelm Arthur more than the sickness did...especially every time he talked to John. It was like he was more worried about the future of John and his family than his own health. 

John buried his head in his hands, overfilled with grief and heartache. He yearned for Arthur. For his company, his advice...his touch. John never truly understood the feelings he had for Arthur. But he knew that Arthur definitely meant something to him. 

Well, not something. _Everything._

With sorrowful thoughts and a tight heart, John found himself drifting to sleep once again. His eyelids were heavy, and his body gently crumpled to the ground. He started to doze off right there on the dirty ground in front of his house. He was sure Abigail would yell and question him when she found him later. But it was alright. It didn't even matter. John just wanted to fall asleep again.

Because then, he would be with Arthur. 

**Author's Note:**

> I finished the game yesterday and cried my eyes out. Never loved a video game character as much as I did with Arthur. He's a beautiful man, and his relationship with John is also so beautiful. I love them. I'm still crying.


End file.
